I try to be aware and grateful each day of my life but there are certain times or events that bring into sharper reality how much I do have for which to be thankful. My life is full. I have an amazingly supportive husband and a marriage that makes my heart swell with pride; no words can ever encompass how he truly completes me. I have a family that, even in the midst of conflicts, is supportive and bands together. I have an extended family through very close friends that I adore.  I have my pup and cat that give unconditional love. I work with caring people and am pursuing creative endeavors that round out my life. But while my life is full, my heart heavy.

Last week my best, good girl lost her mother. My heart is broken for her. I can not begin to imagine the pain she has been going through or will have to endure. I know she will make it through this and it will make her an even more remarkable person (if this is even possible) but I am sure that losing her mother consumes her; it would consume me and my best, good girl and I are connected at the heart, so I have this on good authority.

I want to say to you, my best, good girl: you are brave in your sadness. While your world is topsy-turvy and nothing will ever be the same and I am sure nothing makes sense right about now and you doubt if it ever will, remember: you are the constant and you will take all the words and love your sweet mama gave you and you will make this place so much better than you already have, just by being you, my sweet. When you want to scream, cry, talk or just sit remember you have so many people who love you and want to surround you with support but you have to be gentle with yourself, as gentle and tender as you are with everyone else.

Today, more than any to date, I am thankful for the survivor in all of us.  When our road seems hopeless, there is some way through and we will be able to make our lives and the lives of others better, in some way, from everything that we experience. We just have to know this and believe this. xox


8 thoughts on “Full…….

  1. Renee, I remember the first Thanksgiving without my mom. I thought my heart would never recover. I was 21 then, and this is my 21st Thanksgiving without her. My heart is now made fuller with her memory. As I cook, I connect with her. As I partake of the traditional foods, I remember where I came from. Those sweet momma’s are never far from us, even when they are in spirit. They live in our hearts. And maybe that is why our heart must break when they pass, because it has to make room for them to live there more fully than before. I am sending the support of one who has been there and survived to your best, good girl as she faces the rebuilding of her heart. And to you, I send the same. Momma’s often share their love with all the youngsters around them. And no doubt, you were touched by her. Big hugs, Fly Sister! And may your day be blessed by the memory of the one who has passed and by the love you are giving to your friend. …Rae

  2. Renee – this is lovely, your friend knows, she just has to, how lucky she is to have you. Sadly I went through this very thing last year when one of my dearest friends lost her father on Thanksgiving. This year, we made a point to celebrate his life over the holiday. Hugs to you and your friend. Kim

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